It snowed last night. Now, I don’t know where all of you are reading this from, but it tends to do that around this time in Indiana. Like, pretty much every year.

Still, every single year people freak out and stampede to the store the second a weatherman even mentions the s-word. I stopped at the store on my way home from a doctor appointment yesterday because we needed milk (we always need milk…) and the shelves were looking pretty bare.

Also, people buy the weirdest stuff before snow. There were lots of empty spots in the liquor/wine section, and half of the ice cream was gone. I’m guessing a lot of people thought they were getting snowed in, so probably a lot of people are hating life right now because they’re at work with a hangover.

This morning, I looked outside and saw that we did indeed have a fair amount of snow on the ground. It was really nothing major, but I still said a silent thank you that I didn’t have to bother with driving to work in it.

See, before I became a stay at home mom I worked for years in the Indianapolis/Carmel area and had at least an hour commute on a good day. When winter hit, I would be sure to keep bottles of water in my car along with extra clothes and snacks just in case I got stranded. I would leave two hours before I had to be at work on bad days. Sometimes even that wasn’t enough, but I was usually lucky enough to have an understanding boss.

The winter I moved back home from Texas was pretty snowy, and I often found myself in the middle of a two-hour drive. One such morning was especially nerve-wracking after I saw a number of cars slide off of the road and, on one occasion, spin out an narrowly miss hitting me. Once I was off of the interstate, I hit some major congestion due to the slow traffic. I was doing my best to keep as much space between me and the car in front of me when I checked my rearview and noticed a powder blue single cab pickup that seemed to be intent on climbing up my tailpipe. Annoyed, I carefully tapped the brake. He just got closer, and then he started swerving to the right and left as if he were going to go around me. This went on for a few miles, until he finally got an opening in the left lane and went flying by me. What a jerk.

I was only about 30 minutes late when I finally got to work, and a coworker asked how the drive went. I rolled my eyes and told him about the tailgaiting bag of douche I encountered just as some guy walked out of the back room with a grin on his face.

“You drive a black Jetta, Texas plates?”

“…it’s actually dark blue.”

“Well honey, I know you probably didn’t see much of that white stuff where you come from, but you live in Indiana now. You’re gonna hafta learn how to drive in it or stay home in your little jammies.”

At this point, my coworkers eyebrows completely disappeared into his hairline as he clapped a hand over his mouth.

“Actually, I was only in Texas for two years…I was born and raised in Indiana and I learned how to drive in the snow just fine. I think you need a few lessons on not riding someone’s ass in shitty road conditions, and maybe a couple on how not to be a condescending dickwad. Also, what kind of grown man drives a powder blue pickup?!”

I walked away as he rolled his eyes at me and let my coworker know he’d be back, he just had to get something from his office…turned out he was there to fix the lights in the back room.

A few hours went by and I had all but forgotten the interaction when Mr. Douchenozzle himself walked back in… And this time, his smug smile had been replaced by a bit of a sheepish look.

“Miss, I owe you a big apology. After I left here, I was in a hurry and this old lady was going real slow in front of me. I must have been a little too close, ’cause she tried to stop all of a sudden and dammit if I didn’t plow right into her. Anyway, everyone’s fine but I guess you were right.”

With that, he went to the back room, finished his work, and left without speaking another word to anyone.

Douchenozzle – 0
Karma – 1

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